My Quest For Joy

I think we all find ourselves surrounded by negative influences. We watch the news, which is full of stories of violence, political upheavals, adverse weather, terrorist attacks, and overall negativity. Lately, it has been all about the pandemic. I would dare say that there is not one person that doesn't have some kind of struggle in their personal lives right now. 

Where do we find the peace and joy that we seek? I would guess this is a universal question. Perhaps it depends on what we choose each day to think about and do. Are we pursuing positive news, positive goals, and positive actions? 

A very great man who was our Prophet, President Gordon B. Hinckley often spoke about finding joy and happiness in our lives. I thought today my quest for in my pursuit of joy, that I might share with you some of his priceless thoughts on happiness. 

 

 1. “In all of living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured.” 

 2. “Generally speaking, the most miserable people I know are those who are obsessed with themselves; the happiest people I know are those who lose themselves in the service of others...By and large, I have come to see that if we complain about life, it is because we are thinking only of ourselves.”

 3. “Cultivate an attitude of happiness. Cultivate a spirit of optimism. Walk with faith, rejoicing in the beauties of nature, in the goodness of those you love, in the testimony which you carry in your heart concerning things divine.” 

 4.  “Don’t be gloomy. Do not dwell on unkind things. Stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. Even if you are not happy, put a smile on your face. ‘Accentuate the positive.’ Look a little deeper for good. Go forward in life with a twinkle in your eye and a smile on your face, with a great and strong purpose in your heart. Love life.”

 5. “Be believing, be happy, don't get discouraged. Things will work out.” 

 6. “Let us be happy people. The Lord's plan is a plan of happiness. The way will be lighter, the worries will be fewer, the confrontations will be less difficult if we cultivate a spirit of happiness.”

 7.  “You can be smart and happy or stupid and miserable. . . it's your choice”  I have to add that this is one of my favorite quotes from him. It is our choice. 

 8. "Happy is the man who can brush aside the offending remarks of another and go on his way.” 

 9.  “God bless you, my beloved sisters, who stand as the queens in your home, that you may be happy with that happiness which comes of the knowledge that you are loved and honored and treasured.” 

10. “We've got to have a little humor in our lives. You had better take seriously that which should be taken seriously, but, at the same time, we can bring in a touch of humor now and again. If the time ever comes when we can’t smile at ourselves, it will be a sad time.”  

11. “In my ninety-plus years, I have learned a secret. I have learned that when good men and good women face challenges with optimism, things will always work out! Truly, things always work out! Despite how difficult circumstances may look at the moment, those who have faith and move forward with a happy spirit will find that things always work out.”  

12.  “Go forward in life with a smile on your face, a sparkle in your eyes, and with a great and strong purpose in your heart. The best things in life are the people in your life, the moments we live, and memories we made along the way.” 

13. “The way of the Lord is the way of happiness. ‘Wickedness never was happiness. Transgression never was happiness. Sin never was happiness. Disobedience never was happiness. The way of happiness is following the way of the Lord. I believe this with all my heart.” 

14. “The gospel is a thing of joy. It provides us with a reason for gladness. Of course, there is sorrow. Of course, there are hours of concern and anxiety. We all worry. But the Lord has told us to lift our hearts and rejoice.”  

 

 In ending these thoughts is a final quote from this beloved Prophet, President Gordon B. Hinckley: “What I am suggesting is that each of us turns from the negativism that permeates our society and looks for the remarkable good among those with whom we associate, that we speak of one another’s virtues more than we speak of one another’s faults, that optimism replace pessimism, that our faith exceeds our fears. When I was a young man and was prone to speak critically, my father would say: “Cynics do not contribute, skeptics do not create, doubters do not achieve.” 

I am challenging myself and those of you that read this to look for joy every day. Seek out the sunshine and leave the clouds behind.  A favorite scripture of mine is found in the Book of Mormon; 2 Nephi 2:25: ".....men are, that they might have joy."

 

A Day To Celebrate Mothers ~

 Mother's Day, to me, is touched with emotion. It is a day to celebrate, but I didn't always feel that way for many years. I was hard on myself, thinking that I had to be the perfect mother, and in trying to do so, I felt I failed. As I had children, I felt like the mother who doesn't want to let their child out of sight. I was there, desiring to help them through every step of navigating the different stages of life. I found out soon that with 6 children, I couldn't keep up with the expectation all the time. My children had the agency to make choices, and it was my responsibility to teach them and then pray and hope that when they were on their own, they would make those right choices. As you probably know, children don't always do that. They push the boundaries and want to do it themselves. If they didn't do it right, then, of course, I took it personally. I wasn't the mother I thought I should be. Therefore for many years, receiving those flowers in church on Mother's Day was sometimes difficult.  

Slowly, as the years have gone by, I have found peace in knowing that I loved my children with all my heart and that I did try to be the best Mom I could be. I wasn't perfect, and I haven't raised perfect children either. I feel that my husband and I have raised some remarkable children trying hard to stay on the covenant path; that brings peace to my soul. 

As my understanding of the love our Heavenly Father has for each of us and how the Savior through His atonement provides the way for us all to return to them through his mercy and grace, we can keep trying and overcoming and being better than we think we can. We can seek forgiveness for those rare moments when maybe we didn't handle the situation right.  

Some motherhood thoughts of wisdom learned: 

I think it is important to understand that we have Heavenly Parents. As spirit children, I feel that we spent a great deal of time learning from our Heavenly Parents about our turn on earth in the Pre-mortal life.  Perhaps in this existence, we spent a lot of time sitting at the feet of our Heavenly Mother. I feel that we also walked, talked, and were loved by our Elder Brother Jesus Christ. We were taught well. 

As we each have come down to this earth, we pass through a veil into our mortal life. We can't remember what that spirit life was like. We came to gain a body and then be tested to see if we would do all things we had learned about before that we now can't remember. Earth life is a giant adventure in learning. All of us are in different stages of learning. Knowing about that perfect plan of our Heavenly Father is very important to find out. This plan is perfect and can tell us how to return to the presence of our Heavenly Parents and Savior, Jesus Christ. This plan is called the Plan of Salvation or the Plan of Happiness. You can read more about his plan here!

When I was a young mother, I read many books on how to raise children. I felt like there wasn't a perfect manual for raising children. I then gained a testimony of "The Book of Mormon." I now know it is the prime child-rearing book. If you study the pages and learn the stories, they are there to teach you how to work with your children. It is amazing all the questions that can be answered within the pages. This precious book starts with a rather imperfect family where great lessons are learned.  There are great Bible stories to help you teach principles too. 

Being able to keel in prayer to your Heavenly Father is key to learning how to be a good Mom. Learn to kneel often, especially when frustrated, impatient, worried, concerned, and for answers to questions, you may have. When you feel like this, kneel and pray.  I promise you will feel a spirit of peace come over you, and thoughts will come into your mind on how to handle a difficult situation. Utilize prayer as the key to the spirit helping you with your parenting.  

One important way to succeed in having a good parent relationship with your spouse to help one parent. This means supporting the decisions made by each of you. How I love the strength my husband was as a father and support to me as a mother. 

Finally, never give up on yourself. Always remember that being a mother allows you to learn and become more Christ-like yourself. It doesn't happen overnight. Be patient with yourself in your mothering. 

Finally, you will never stop being a parent and having those feelings of frustration in raising your children. Even now, as a parent of adult children who is raising their own, you have the blessing of watching them learn and grow through the experiences of parenthood. Now you must exercise great patience in letting them make their own mistakes unless they ask for help. 

So tomorrow, wherever you might be with family or not, enjoy your day knowing that you did or are doing the best you can. Get rid of the negative feelings because we are here for the very purpose of learning how to love and care for one another. This all takes patients, trust, faith, learning, and time. Our Heavenly Parents and even our earthly parents are here or near for the very purpose of helping us find the way back to them.

Always remember, "You Are Enough."